A Writer's Life

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Tuesday, July 26, 2011


sssssSomething better! Something more! This is not working. 

"If not this, then what?" I inquire.

hmmm I dont know, that’s for you to figure out. Give me something thatssss thatsss thatsss…what do I say…mmm…something that defines us…something so creative…soooo sooo dynamic…you know!

Ya ya! I get that! Mmm yes, I am listening, I am getting it


horn ok please...JAMMMMMM...signal...gosh! there is lot of traffic in my head. NOthing is clear, everything is smoky, shady 

...and all I can retrieve is some few images here and there...no! No happiness! It’s a far distant land, right now. I can think of images that are everything but not work-related. I can view a punctured plane, yes…a PUNCTURED plane! And the eye-popping, jaw-dropping, heart-locking sight of a pilot supervising the mechanics, who are repairing the plane. I am STROLLING by the airport premises, and there is an angel-like circle above this young, sturdy man’s (in real life, my hubby. He always has a special place in my imagination and my life) head, when I first look at him. 

When he finally does look at me, he is amazed at my beauty. I am looking somewhere upwards, trying to locate a cupid. And finally, there is no such thing there, I ain’t ready to let go off my imagination and I hang on it, thinking they must have gone for a break. I am now the new cupid, in-charge of my own love story, and so I touch my back and effortlessly, get my hands on the arrow and strike it right into the Mr’s heart, piercing it hard. 

He reacts instantaneously, holds me sideways, leans forward to kiss me. I look into his eyes, and the gaze is a long-lasting one, until I coquettishly look away and what do I see is the plane right on top of his head. The plane lost its balance and uncontrolled, it started to wheel over us…IMAGINE…the budding love and the lovers crushed mercilessly by some MRF tyres…and this young man, showed his muscle power, and screeeecchhhh…no! Not the tyres of the plane but the spinning head of mine and my imagination came to an abrupt halt. That’s all I was thinking, when I was supposed to think some real catchy and witty lines for my assignment. A cloud of thought, the imaginary wave of the imagination seems to have no steering wheel, unlike our physical self, it roams around freely in its own world.

How can I possibly submit the assignment I have in hand...that requires my creativity squeezed from my brains, spinning them and leaving them knotted to have every drop of it in the write-up...uuughhh! This is driving me crazy. Writer's block! writer's block...if I had to rename this in one word...it would be more like a WRIbl. How it rhymes with riddle. And how I want to rebel. Huh! A mystery, yet unresolved, and why does it happen to me all the time. I mean...cant I think..am I some sort of a lost-in-the-thinking planet-praani?

Gosh! Thinking was never such a pain.
Or was it ever my domain????

It gives me sharp pangs of oohs and ouches in my head.
And yet nothing is on paper as yet.

No, I figured it out. Blame Bill Gates! Microsoft Word must be having a bug, yet undiscovered, of sucking away the creative energy out of you just like it deletes every creation of yours on a single continuous hit on Backspace.

Similarly, apparently, it is deleting away the thoughts and every constituent of it, effortlessly, from every possible thinking space from your head, leaving it all cluttered to think of things beyond work.
Yes, I am creative, in the sense that I have the creative imagination to think creative.
hah! I wish...I wish...I had a factory of thoughts that supplied me the thoughts based on my demand. That’s economics...shucks! What the f*** am I writing. 

No, but seriously, have you faced this ever? If you have, then believe me there are people like me, sharing your mind space, we are fellow beings. Hi I am Ms. Non-Creative-But-Trying-Creativity. And you?

The only thing left to do is walk backwards, pour the tea cup, with its contents intact, upside down on my head, and get something done to let my creative juices flow. 

A Good Source for Boosting Creativity
Or should I try inserting some batteries in me…maybe mine have reached their expiry date or something. I strongly wish we had some dose, some supplement for improving on our creativity, the health status of our write brain…I mean the right-brain. Just like we pop in some vitamin tablets and lo! We are rid of all the deficiency in finding the right vegetable or source of vitamin and then cook or prepare it and ensure we keep having it all the time, everyday. That sucks! I need a creativity tablet - CREcin. 

And its chemical composition would be inclusive of: fresh thoughts as fresh as a new-born baby, as warm and welcoming as the new mother’s warm hands holding the baby, as reliable as the strength of the bond the mother-baby share. And as picture-perfect as my imagination, when I am writing this. 

I think my imagination needs to rest. So I apply the BRAKE and give you a BREAK! 

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Vyoma's Adventures in EmotiveLand

This is my land for sure! Whenever, I, like Alice of the 'Alice in Wonderland' classic, want to withdraw from my life, I choose to visit my Emotive land. This is not just a land but a forest, where there are innumerable trees, where the leaves on these trees: are people I meet everyday, the crowd I am surrounded with everyday, the tree trunks are the societal limitations that disallow me to walk on my path, force me to take turns to find my way out of my emotive forest. The animals, herein, and the roars and chirps and laughs and beasts of this forest area, called Emotive land, are the situations I am escaping from. I seek escape to take rescue into the hearts of the wood, the flute player, the creator, THE Krishna, who lives in this land, in the deep deep forest of my Emotive land, of my emotions.

I am struggling to find my way to him. The forest is so thick and dangerous, I have to go through all these adventures to find my way to the tunes of the flute played by Krishna...and once i reach there, i am all myself...fearless, one with my soul, beautiful, a soul of purity, my bagged shoulders are released of the external pressures and i rest on his lap, just one look at HIM, and i am one with the universe...hey! whatz this? all my fears are eloping and whatz that? Krishna- my angel, my God, is in front of me...my eyes are open when writing this but what i see is not these black and white print but an inexplicable feeling, my feet are feeling the weightlessness of my body, i am lifted in air, yet i can touch Mother Earth, my journey of life continues but my spirit wont budge out of this heavenly place...the flute is the only thing my ear ever wanted to hear, HIS beauty is enormous, his eyes are a window to the world, reflecting every pleasant emotion, I ever felt...and here's something you need to see...this leaf...and what is this? something is written on it...and i keep reading...while the script changes and in no time, I have the knowledge of the world...i am typing only what i am seeing, i am sensing at this point of time...i am with my Lord, my LORD KRISHNA! his curly tresses are similar to mine...his lips are honey-dipped and moisture-ladened...he doesn't speak...yet i hear him...i have never felt so pure...i am breathing the breath he exhales...the whole world is breathing it...he LOVES me...and everyone of us...he is so JUST...the leaves and trees are dancing and whooing in HIS ALMIGHTY's presence...KRISHNA, i am now blank...lying down on the greenest grass ever..gazing at Krishna while HE gazes back at me...i wish to close my eyes to enjoy his instrumental music...and want to dip deep into his melodies but i cant coz i dont want to lose sight of him...but i have no control...my eyes belong to HIM...the creator, follows his will and shuts fast...i am drifted but only in my thoughts, i open my eyes into the real world...but my soul opens its eyes to see KRISHNA...my soul is still there...and i am here...but i know i havent left my EMOTIVE land...my KRISHNA and i learnt what LORD wanted to educate me, educate us..i am born, herein, to LIVE...to LIVE the pleasures i have been gifted with, the relations that i am bestowed with...inspite of all the societal pressures...coz these are so feeble to fight this mighty emotion that i just felt and i am still elated with...LETZ LIVE on this beautiful planet...STOP TERRORIZING and being in TERROR...its not a beautiful life...its a life that is beyond beautiful...you can only live it to feel the essence of it...COME, LETZ LIVE.